The First Wives Club's Exuberant 'You Don't Own Me' Resonates Now More Than Ever
My novel 'Advika and the Hollywood Wives' is now out in paperback. This movie moment reminds me of why I wrote it.
Before Real Housewives or Desperate Housewives, and definitely before Advika and the Hollywood Wives, there was The First Wives Club.
And with Advika out in paperback today, I can’t think of a more fitting Free Happiness moment to share than this one.
This week we would have marked the 51st anniversary of Roe v. Wade. During the spring of 2022, when we were all freshly shocked and angered over news of its reversal, I came across The First Wives Club on TV.
I'd been having a difficult day, so I let myself shut out the world and sink into the movie. Watching Bette Midler, Diane Keaton and Goldie Hawn soon lifted my spirits. But it was the movie’s ending, when they exuberantly break out into Lesley Gore’s “You Don’t Own Me,” that moved me to tears.
I realized that not only would the song be a fitting theme song for Advika, but for all of us, as our personal and bodily autonomy was now threatened to an alarming degree. In writing Advika’s story, I could have never imagined how much her relationship with her husband and what he wants from her would have echoes in current events.
And how she manages to push back against his control, with the help of her friends and her “weird sisterhood” with the other wives, buoyed me as I wrote it, and still buoys me now.
As we mourn the fact we are not commemorating Roe, the defiant spirit of “You Don’t Owe Me” remains as resonant as ever. I’m so grateful to have come across Bette, Diane and Goldie’s performance when I needed it. It’s such an exultant celebration of sisterhood and friendship, and how by banding together we can fight back against those which aim to break us down. And this is what I hope that my novel imparts too.
A bit more on Advika:
**Yes, Advika is now out in paperback! In fact, the above post is an excerpt from my essay that appears in the paperback edition, which also has a reading group guide.
I’m so proud of this book, which has received praise from Cosmopolitan, Buzzfeed, Parade, The Associated Press and more. And I’m thankful to Meena Harris for this lovely blurb:
If you’d like to hear me discuss the novel, you can check out my new podcast interviews with Writer’s Bone and Women Wine Words.
And if you read Advika or are planning to, I would be so appreciative if you would leave a review at Amazon, Goodreads or elsewhere!
Pop culture rec:
**If you’re a fan of The Amazing Race, you might enjoy the YouTube channel Jet Lag as much as I do. It’s more charmingly lo-fi than TAR, with inventive game play that replicates board games—except the board game happens to be America, Japan and New Zealand. I hope they turn this into a real board game someday.
**I’ve been rewatching Broad City for the first time since it originally aired, and it more than holds up. If you’ve never seen it before, or forgot how hilariously awesome it is, this list of the best Broad City episodes is a good starting point.
This week’s fun fact:
This fun fact sounds like an urban legend. It’s also a bit long, so let’s get into it:
After losing a drunken poker bet, a New Zealand man legally changed his name to (drumroll)… “Full Metal Havok More Sexy N Intelligent Than Spock and All the Superheroes Combined with Frostnova.”
It took five years, but the 99-character name was approved by the New Zealand government and appears on his official documents. Moral of the story: don’t do any drunken poker bets. Or just drunken bets in general.
And that’s it! Thanks so much for reading and have an excellent week.
Love this!